Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Worst Hairdon't on the Planet

Sorry about that last post, it wasn't negative. I feel like i've let my fan down (yes, i realize that "fan" is singular). It won't happen again. Well, it probably will, but if it starts happening too much, i'll change the title of my blog so i'm not accused of false advertisement.

So. . . . I woke up this morning. Obviously. . . . . . . Anyway, it was early because i just got back from scotland yesterday. I heard the wind howling outside and, without looking, decided that it would be better if i just stayed in bed, which i did and still am. While i was laying there, i decided to surf the web. Somehow or another, i came to the conclusion that tall hair * is dumb. The only way i can describe tall hair is by using the word (and link) bumpit. That's right, if you suffer from this affliction of the brain, i'm sorry. It's not a personal attack, but i realize you might be personally offended by me, so just realize that it's life and it'll probably happen again.

Back to the hair. What i don't understand, and it might be because i'm a guy, is why ANYONE would ever, EVER, feel the need to put this contraption in their hair. It doesn't look good, it's probably annoying, and it makes you look like an idiot. This is probably stereotypical, but when i see women wearing this hairdon't, i think they're not as smart as women with normal hairdos. Obviously, my opinion doesn't matter for crap, and if you want this hairbarf, you'll probably do it regardless, just know that you look dumb. If that's a look you're cool with, then more power to you.

For some reason, i thought about this because i was thinking about typical utah women, and how they suck. (this probably stems from wallowing in misery from being alone, but that's a different topic on a different blog) What is the typical utah woman, you ask? oh, you didn't? well, i'll tell you anyway. The typical utah woman: any woman in utah that goes after a guy with a big truck and boat and loves to be tan. She also has the "bumpit" hair style. This woman typically loves going on cruises and boating at lake powell, or any other boating destination, and in general doesn't have an opinion about anything. Editor's Note: you must suffer from all said attributes in order to be classified as a typical utah woman. Suffering from a couple isn't a big deal.
There are more than you think.

Anyway, that's it. bad hairdo. i'd apologize for the tangent, but i would be lying.

So. . . . anyway. . . . todays post was. . . . . . typical. It's good to be back.


*not all tall hair is dumb. Some times if it's pulled back from the front, it looks good. Just specifically this one:

3 comments:

Jordyn Parry said...

I was actually curious about what guys thought of the bump-it and the whole elevated hair look... Thank you for the insight, and I will now try to return my bump-it and get something useful, like a tanning membership.

MindySue said...

I don't mind a little volume in the back, but not of THIS variety or extent. That girls hair is way too high. But what really kills me is when (on the commercial) they show the SUPER bump-it. Holy crap. That is the kind of hair reserved for some type of southern beauty pagent contestant from the 50s or something. I can't get over it. I think that Kenzie secretly wants to bump her hair. She is obsessed with guessing who has a bump-it in their hair and even went so far as to ask me if I "bumped" Sophie's hair because it was sticking up just a little in the back. Um. No.

Kami Hardcastle said...

So glad you brought up such an important topic Matt. A moral dilemma, truly. The pressure was so great! I caved and tried to make a mini bump (you know, just to test the waters). I put a bobby pin in the top and teased a bit in the front, but in the end I was just another Utah girl with big hair. It's sad really, chasing the "look" and the "life" of a bump girl. All I ever really wanted was a white Lexus! I thought the mini bump was my ticket! Forgive me.