Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Bluetooth Headset = Crabs for Your Ear

I really can't believe i've never talked about this.

Safety Disclaimer: Let me start out by saying, there are times (actually, that should be singular) when you look (and are) less stupid for using a bluetooth headset. That's when you are driving. Some states have outlawed talking on a cellphone without a hands free, despite some experts arguing that it is the act of holding a conversation which is actually dangerous. Anyway, i'm grudgingly starting to accept the fact that it's ok to have one in the car. End of Disclaimer.

OK, so some people aren't really that educated on the etiquette of bluetooth headsets (bluetooths, bluetooth, or blueteeth for short). For those people, i've summed up the rules into one simple sentence, that i will elaborate on later.

Don't use blueteeth unless it is a life or death emergency. End of story.

For those people who just don't get it, let me elaborate.

When you're in a restaurant, you don't actually need to have your bluetooth in your ear. You aren't that important. I'm going out on a limb and am going to guess that you aren't making decisions that will effect the balance of human life on this planet. P.S. It's similar to "here, let me just set my phone on the table, i'm awaiting a really important phone call that is more important then any of you."

When you are in an airport, you don't actually need to have your bluetooth in your ear. You aren't that important. I'm going out on a limb and am going to guess that you aren't making decisions that will effect the balance of human life on this planet. P.S. If you do, don't look at people, it's creepy, and they think you're talking to them.

When you are walking down the street, you don't actually need to have your bluetooth in your ear. You aren't that important. I'm going out on a limb and am going to guess that you aren't making decisions that will effect the balance of human life on this planet. P.S. It's ok to hold a phone to your head. They won't cause cancer.

When you are conquering countries, you don't actually need to have your bluetooth in your ear. You aren't that important. I'm going out on a limb and am going to guess that you aren't making decisions that will effect the balance of human life on this planet. P.S. Yes, i realize that being a dictator makes you feel important, but honestly, people just think you're pretentious.

There are a ton more situations, but i've already posted a post earlier and i feel like i don't want to be one of "those guys" or a "two poster" as i say. I guess if you gain anything from this, remember to think before you use the bluetooth.

Safety Disclaimer: One of my friends, Chad (i think), created a karate move called The Bluetooth, which entails the victim getting the bluetooth slapped into his brain. I am not trying to brag when i say that i'm fully trained in that karate move.

1 comment:

MindySue said...

Funniest post yet, I swear.

Oh BTW, I gave you an award on my blog. Nothing like a bit of nepotism to lend you(or me) some credibilty. Have fun with it.
http://readingforsanity.blogspot.com/2010/05/award-palooza.html