Sunday, October 17, 2010

Astronauts: True Love

I can't believe i've never written about this. It's as if the golden goose that lays golden eggs flew right by me as i was loading my mossberg 590 a1 9 shot, landed in front of me, honked a bit and strutted around for a moment as i stood there, fiddling with the shells, then took off. Luckily, i'm a good shot (for the sake of this blog, we'll say i'm a good shot) and i blasted that golden goose out of the sky.


A while back, maybe a year or two, or three, or 6 months. . . . I don't really know and i'm not interested enough to look it up. Literally, it would take me seconds and i'm not going to do it. . . . . anyway. . . . . the astronaut love triangle. Need a recap? I'll make it quick and probably inaccurate.

girl astronaut dates guy astronaut. Other girl astronaut is jealous. Drives a nasa hover car around the world wearing diapers with plans of kidnapping first girl astronaut. Maces her, blah blah blah etc etc etc, BOOM, she's in jail. Fast forward 7 months or a year or a week and here i am, writing this little piece of nonfiction. Click here for the full story.

Anyway. . . Once again, i'm left here feeling as if the world has taken crazy pills. At what point in the application to be an astronut process, do they screen for being crazy? I would have thought that it would be early on, but apparently they don't screen for craziness at all. Which is great because probably 57% of crazy people want to be astronauts. I know i do.

It really is great to see the progress we've made in accepting and integrating crazy people into our society. I mean, 100 years ago, we weren't allowing crazy people to venture into space, but now, we've found a way to help these people out. Personally, i would have taken the integration in a different direction. Maybe start out with something a little less expensive and time consuming and life threatening and maybe something not at the forefront of national and international media, like park maintenance‡, or something along those lines. It's cool though. . . . . Astronaut works all the same.

Anyway. . . in the end, the moral of the story is maybe think things through before you act, especially if diapers are in the plan. You might be able to tie socialism and universal healthcare into it somehow, but as of this moment, i'm not sure.

‡ If you work in park maintenance, i'm sorry, i wasn't implying that you're crazy, it was just the first thing that popped into my head.

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