Thursday, December 16, 2010

The Great Decay of Modern Society: Miley Cyrus

*Disclaimer*

Actually, there is nothing to disclaim.

*End of Disclaimer*


Nothing is more entertaining than watching a train wreck, except maybe an airplane wreck, or a dolphin doing some sweet aerial acrobatics. My problem isn't so much that these "train wrecks" are happening. It's that they're being hailed as "news" on these alleged "news" channels, like cnn. [And today's top stories: earthquakes in chile, wars around the world. miley cyrus uses a bong. wtf (what the french)]. I mean, i would understand this with fox news. Mr. beck and ms. cyrus are on an equal playing field in my book (not mare kin's books), but really? cnn? What's next, an idiotic show on TLC about an ignorant woman posturing herself to become presi. . . . . ohhhhhhhhhhh fuuuuuuuuudge [like on the christmas story].


That's it. We've now officially entered into a new age. No longer are we in the bronze age nor are we in the space age. We have now entered the Great Decay of Modern Society . . . . . . age. i guess we could trace the origins back to britney spears and n'sync (sorry backstreet boys) but the truth of the matter is, it really didn't take off until ms. lohan, who has been the conductor of one continual train wreck since herbie goes bananas, but ms. cyrus has taken the cake. No, literally, she took the cake after she was finished making bong hits for Jesus. Not only did she take it, but she then devoured the entire thing. It was impressive in a weird unimpressive sort of way.


Do we blame CNN? Do we blame the news agencies? After all, they're the ones who are showing this crap. Or do we blame the consumers who eat it up then give it good ratings? Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, in this case, people definitely came first, but for the sake of this blog, we're just going to go ahead and blame the networks. . . . actually let's just do 50/50. . . . . well, 60/40.


Anyway, sometimes i feel like maybe i shouldn't blame "celebrities" at all. After all, these train conductors wouldn't act like that if nobody watched them [yes, they would]. Yes they would, the only difference is that my eyes would stop melting every time i was tricked into watching some ridiculous stunt all in the name of fame. The networks need to make dedicated channels for these things and keep them separate. We need a separation of news and "news".


This is kind of bold statement, but maybe if we just rounded all these "celebrities" (non-contributing humans) and put them in maybe a camp of some sorts. That way, they could just entertain themselves. Since none of them really contribute in any sort of way, i'd imagine they might go extinct, which might not be such a bad thing.


That's right. Drink up. It's orange flavored hatorade and it's gooooooooooood.

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