Friday, December 24, 2010

The Homeless: Can't Take a Joke

So, i was driving down the road the other day and i hit a big slush puddle, spraying a whole bunch of homeless guys. I mean, they were all lined up there, basically begging for it. After i passed, i looked back and it appeared like they were upset, so i drove around the block so i could drive past them again, i slowed down, held some money out the window and as they were walking forward to take it, i speedily drove off again, not only denying them the money, but also spraying them again. I looked back to see that they were once again quite upset, so i drove around the block one more time and in an effort to quell their anger, i rolled my window down and told them my famous why-were-the-little-strawberries-upset-because-they-were-in-a-jam joke. None of them laughed. . . . . ug. lighten up.

But seriously, that may or may not have happened.

Anyway, i brought up homelessness because they other day, i saw a homeless man (he looked like he was 18) holding a sign that said "parents killed by ninjas. any spare change will help." i chuckled to myself, gave him a nod of approval and drove by.

While i appreciate the homeless having a sense of humor, i'm not sure if having that as a sign increased his daily earnings. It probably did because people really buy into that stuff, but should it? I mean, i feel that if you're able to make jokes like that, you're really not as down on your luck as you think you are because if you were really really down on your luck, you'd be too miserable to do stuff like that. That would be like someone with cancer making jokes. It just shouldn't be allowed.

Oh, another thing i saw was a homeless guy with the sign around his neck. . . . like he's too tired to hold the sign. I mean, that seemed kind of lazy to me, and it's not like he has anything better to do. I guess maybe he wanted his hands free to accept money, but that seemed kind of presumptuous. Instead of asking for money, why don't they just get jobs? It seems like a no brainer, especially since the majority of the homeless are white middle-aged males (near fact) Finding a job should be pretty easy. . . . . . Anyway. . . .

Luckily, the homeless can't read so i'm not worried about offending any of them.


MindySue said...

1) I'm pretty sure you're going to hell.

2) Many of the homeless population are suffering from mental illness and have difficulty holding down a job.

3) Have you seen some of these guys? Would you hire them?

4) I'm pretty sure you're going to hell.

Matthew said...

1) relax.
2) i know. it was a joke.
3) i look like these guys 90% of the time.
4) relax.