After leaving my cellular telephone on the counter, and putting some noodles on the stove, i walked into the bathroom so i could go to the bathroom. Because that's what you do in the bathroom. Anyway, When i shut the door, the doorknob came off in my hand. Usually, it wouldn't be that bad because the important part of the doorknob would be on the inside, but unfortunately, it was on the other side. I know this because when i looked down, it wasn't attached to the doorknob in my hand. My day flashed before my eyes. Not going to lie. Kind of a sad, boring day. Ug.
My first instinct was to cry, so i did, for quite a long time.
My second instinct was to use the toilet, since that was the reason i went in there in the first place.
My third instinct was to try and escape out the window. This didn't work out well because a) there was a special plexiglass covering over the window (not even sure why) and b) even if i could get the plexiglass off, there was a bush blocking my way.
My fourth instinct was to give up and kill myself, which i'll admit, i tried, but if you've ever tried to hang yourself with the shower curtain, you'll know that it's not only difficult, but it's not fun in the least.
My fifth instinct was to shout for help, but nobody was home.
My sixth instinct was to break the door down. This didn't work because i didn't even try.
My seventh instinct was to try and open it with odds-and-ends i found around the bathroom, such as shower curtain hangers, toothbrushes, etc...
My eighth instinct was to wait until someone came home, which i would have done, except i had noodles on the stove.
My ninth instinct was to try the fourth one again, which still didn't work.
My tenth and final instinct was to give my third instinct another legitimate shot and bail out the window, which i did. After i stealthfully ripped the plexiglass off the wall, i crawled out the window and through the bush, like a baby escaping from the womb. Double entendre. Zing.
After escaping inconvenience, i quickly took the noodles off the stove, put the doorknob back exactly how it was so that i could share my experience with others, and reflected on what just happened. I realized that it's all about sharing. Sharing is good.