Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Small Bowls: Not to be Confused With Small Bowels

I’m sitting up in Victor, ID. We’re up here to shoot a TV spot for The North Face. Jimmy Chin and Hilaree O’neil are climbing up and skiing off the top of the Grand Teton, while Tim and i climb up in front of them and shoot down and what not. It’s pretty much exactly how it sounds. Awesome. Unfortunately, we’re sitting at jimmy’s house in victor because it’s dumping rain and there would be no point in going up to just get soaked and sit around and not shoot.

So here i am. Sitting. Waiting in anticipation for a glorious serving of mountain and alpine and early mornings and in general, a good beat down, although i’m psyched. Legitimately psyched. Naturally.

But here i am. Sitting. Writing. I just ate breakfast. Some granola. And blueberries. And strawbrerries. They were great.

But here i am. Sitting. Angry. Full of malice. Why? Because i wish people would get real bowls instead of these little plate bowls.

How to you expect someone to eat a hearty bowl of cereal when you’re basically using a glorified plate? It’s stupid.

Back in high school, i accused someone (ford erickson) of having plate bowls and they almost broke my fingers with a drumstick. A wooden one, not a chicken one. . . . . . . This is how passionate people get when you accuse them of having plate bowls. Completely understandable.

I don’t want to say it, but i’m going to, because i want to. If you’re a real marekin, you need a real bowl instead of a little frenchy plate bowl. Because nothing says marekin, like a giant bowl of granola on a cold rainy morning in victor, idaho. Nothing. Except maybe a teeshirt (which i own) that depicts lady liberty riding a motorcycle with a giant flag in the background, but that would be an unfair comparison.

I’ve included a picture of said plate bowl, but it’s not going to do it justice because it makes it look a lot bigger than it actually is, but trust me, it’s basically a plate with some small upturned sides.

100% of the milk that i poured into the plate bowl this morning spilled out onto the floor. All of it. It was the stupidest thing i’d ever seen. I just wanted to frisbee (verb) the plate bowl out the front door, but they weren’t mine so i didn’t. . . . but i wanted to.

Anyway, hopefully the weather breaks and we can get on the mountain, but we’ll see. It turns out la nina is in full swing. Who knew that little girl could be so terrible?

ps - oh i didn’t want you to confuse small bowls with small bowels because people have no control over small bowels and it’d be ridiculous to get mad about something you have no control over.

pps - i also included a picture of my new patriotic shirt because it's awesome.


Cindy Lou said...

Epic all around, Matt.

Courtney said...

loooooovin the shirt, you're so marekin.

Challosh said...

I'll tell you what you need to go along with your plate bowl: a spork. They're only like, the worst invention ever, second only to those shoes that are in the literal shape of feet.