Sunday, August 14, 2011

From the Archives of Matthew Irving: A Brief History of Stupid Inventions

Do you know what was a stupid invention? The car. Yeah, i love sitting, doing nothing for hours on end trying to get somewhere, spending lots of money to put old effing bones in it, only to have it break down every effing time you need it to not break down. EEEFFFFFFFFFFFFF.

What happened to the teleporter? Let's be real, that'd be a much more useful invention. It would save you tons of time, plus you wouldn't have to venture outside when it's balls hot. You could just teleport from your house to where ever you need to go.

Come on guys, let's get on that idea. I could really use it. I personally believe that it would somehow use a gps and a microwave, so if you have those two items, start splicing wires. I'm pretty sure that's the key.

Anyway, sorry it's so brief, i have better things to do then get super mad about something and write my hatred out on a computer.

Oh, do you know what else is a stupid invention. Those bracelets that help your balance and improve your strength and flexibility. If you own one of those, you're an idiot.

love
matt

3 comments:

MindySue said...

Are you reposting in the hope that this will get some comments?

Matthew said...

yeah, and it worked. thanks.

MindySue said...

your welcome.